少兒雙語幽默小故事:分蘋果
1.【分蘋果】 Harry was given two apples, a small one and a large one, by his Mum. Share them with your sister, she Harry gave the small one to his little sister and started touching into the large ! said his sister, If Mum had given them to me I'd have given you the large one and had the small one , said Harry, that's what you've got, so what are you worrying about? 媽媽給了哈里兩個(gè)蘋果,，一個(gè)大一點(diǎn),，另一個(gè)小點(diǎn)兒。跟妹妹分著吃,。媽媽說,。所以，哈里就把小個(gè)的給了妹妹,，自己開始啃那個(gè)大個(gè)的,。哼，妹妹說,，如果媽媽給了我,，我會把大的給你，把小的留給自己的,。對呀 ,，哈里說，你拿到的不就是小的嗎,？還著什么急呀,？
2.【錢不用找了】 Selling secondhand books at our church bazaar, I got into an argument with a prospective customer. He was interested in buying The Pocket Book of Ogden Nash but claimed it was overpriced at 35 cents. Other paperbacks were selling for ten or 15 cents pointed out that the book was in good condition. Nash was a fun poet, and it was for a good cause. He said it was a matter of principle. Ultimately, I agreed to sell him the book for 15 cents. Triumphant, he paid with a $10 bill. "Keep the change," he said. 在教堂的義賣市上賣舊書時(shí)，我與一名準(zhǔn)備買東西的顧客發(fā)生了一場爭論,。他對購買袖珍奧金.納什集頗感興趣,，但是說它要三十五美分開價(jià)過高。其它的平裝書每本才賣十或十五美分,。我指出這本書保存狀況頗好,， 納什是個(gè)有趣的詩人，這個(gè)要價(jià)是合理的,。他說這是個(gè)原則問題,。終，我同意以十五美分的價(jià)格將這本書賣給他,。他得意洋洋,，拿出一張十美元的票子付帳?！傲沐X不用找了,。”他說,。
3.【咒語】 An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you."The old man says without hesitation - "I now pronounce you man and wife."
一個(gè)男人找到一個(gè)巫婆,，要求她解開一條困擾了自己40年的咒語。巫婆說:"或許我可以做的到,，但你必須一字不落地告訴我下咒的時(shí)候說的那句咒語,。"男人毫不猶豫的答道:“‘我現(xiàn)在宣布你們成為夫婦,。’”
4.【誰是上帝】 A little kid asks his father, "Daddy, is God a man or a woman?""Both son. God is both."After a while the kid comes again and asks, "Daddy, is God black or white?""Both son, both."The child returns a few minutes later and says, "Daddy, is Michael Jackson God?"
一個(gè)小孩問他的父親:“爸爸,，上帝是男人還是女人,？”“他二者皆是，孩子,，上帝二者皆是,。”過了一會,，孩子又問:“爸爸,，上帝是黑人還是白人？”“二者皆是,，孩子,，皆是?！焙⒆舆^了一會倒回來說:“爸 爸,，上帝是邁克杰克遜嗎？”
5.【受訓(xùn)的鸚鵡】 There was a little old lady who was nearly blind, and she had three sons who wanted to prove which one was the best to 1 bought her a 15-room mansion, thinking this would surely be the best that any of them could offer 2 bought her a beautiful Mercedes with a chauffeur included, thinking this would surely win her 3 had to do something even better, so he bought her a parrot that he had been training for 15 years to memorize the entire Bible. You could ask the parrot any verse in the Bible, and he could quote it word for word. What a gift that would , the old lady went to the first son and said, "Son, the house is just gorgeous, but it's really much too big for me. I only live in one room, and it's too large to clean and take care of. I really don't need the house, but thank you anyway." Then she confronted her second son with, "Son, the car is beautiful. It has everything you could ever want on it, but I don't drive and really don't like the chauffeur, so please return the car."Next, she went to Son 3 and said, "Son, I just want to thank you for your most thoughtful gift. That chicken was delicious."
從前有一個(gè)近乎失明的小老太,，她有三個(gè)兒子,，每一個(gè)都想向母親證明自己對她比較好。第一個(gè)兒子為她買下一棟有15個(gè)房間的大屋,，他覺得這是對母親比較好的孝順方式,，其他兄弟都比不上。二兒子為她買了一輛漂亮 的奔馳,，還配了個(gè)司機(jī),。他也覺得他一定會贏了。老三為母親買了一只鸚鵡,。這只鸚鵡接受了15年的訓(xùn)練，能一字不落地背誦整部圣經(jīng),，并且不論你問他什么,，他都能從圣經(jīng)里原句引出。這位老太太對他的第一個(gè)兒 子說:“孩子,，你買的房子很棒,。但是它太大了，我只能睡一間屋,，還要花時(shí)間去打理剩下的房間,，謝謝你，但我實(shí)在不需要它,?！苯又龑Χ鹤诱f:“你的車也很好,，再不能找到比那更棒的車了，但我不會開車 ,，也不喜歡那個(gè)司機(jī),，所以你把它拿去推了吧！”后,，她對她的小兒子說:“孩子,，我要感謝你棒的禮物！那只雞實(shí)在是美味??！”
1.【分蘋果】 Harry was given two apples, a small one and a large one, by his Mum. Share them with your sister, she Harry gave the small one to his little sister and started touching into the large ! said his sister, If Mum had given them to me I'd have given you the large one and had the small one , said Harry, that's what you've got, so what are you worrying about? 媽媽給了哈里兩個(gè)蘋果,，一個(gè)大一點(diǎn),，另一個(gè)小點(diǎn)兒。跟妹妹分著吃,。媽媽說,。所以，哈里就把小個(gè)的給了妹妹,，自己開始啃那個(gè)大個(gè)的,。哼，妹妹說,，如果媽媽給了我,，我會把大的給你，把小的留給自己的,。對呀 ,，哈里說，你拿到的不就是小的嗎,？還著什么急呀,？
2.【錢不用找了】 Selling secondhand books at our church bazaar, I got into an argument with a prospective customer. He was interested in buying The Pocket Book of Ogden Nash but claimed it was overpriced at 35 cents. Other paperbacks were selling for ten or 15 cents pointed out that the book was in good condition. Nash was a fun poet, and it was for a good cause. He said it was a matter of principle. Ultimately, I agreed to sell him the book for 15 cents. Triumphant, he paid with a $10 bill. "Keep the change," he said. 在教堂的義賣市上賣舊書時(shí)，我與一名準(zhǔn)備買東西的顧客發(fā)生了一場爭論,。他對購買袖珍奧金.納什集頗感興趣,，但是說它要三十五美分開價(jià)過高。其它的平裝書每本才賣十或十五美分,。我指出這本書保存狀況頗好,， 納什是個(gè)有趣的詩人，這個(gè)要價(jià)是合理的,。他說這是個(gè)原則問題,。終，我同意以十五美分的價(jià)格將這本書賣給他,。他得意洋洋,，拿出一張十美元的票子付帳?！傲沐X不用找了,。”他說,。
3.【咒語】 An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you."The old man says without hesitation - "I now pronounce you man and wife."
一個(gè)男人找到一個(gè)巫婆,，要求她解開一條困擾了自己40年的咒語。巫婆說:"或許我可以做的到,，但你必須一字不落地告訴我下咒的時(shí)候說的那句咒語,。"男人毫不猶豫的答道:“‘我現(xiàn)在宣布你們成為夫婦,。’”
4.【誰是上帝】 A little kid asks his father, "Daddy, is God a man or a woman?""Both son. God is both."After a while the kid comes again and asks, "Daddy, is God black or white?""Both son, both."The child returns a few minutes later and says, "Daddy, is Michael Jackson God?"
一個(gè)小孩問他的父親:“爸爸,，上帝是男人還是女人,？”“他二者皆是，孩子,，上帝二者皆是,。”過了一會,，孩子又問:“爸爸,，上帝是黑人還是白人？”“二者皆是,，孩子,，皆是?！焙⒆舆^了一會倒回來說:“爸 爸,，上帝是邁克杰克遜嗎？”
5.【受訓(xùn)的鸚鵡】 There was a little old lady who was nearly blind, and she had three sons who wanted to prove which one was the best to 1 bought her a 15-room mansion, thinking this would surely be the best that any of them could offer 2 bought her a beautiful Mercedes with a chauffeur included, thinking this would surely win her 3 had to do something even better, so he bought her a parrot that he had been training for 15 years to memorize the entire Bible. You could ask the parrot any verse in the Bible, and he could quote it word for word. What a gift that would , the old lady went to the first son and said, "Son, the house is just gorgeous, but it's really much too big for me. I only live in one room, and it's too large to clean and take care of. I really don't need the house, but thank you anyway." Then she confronted her second son with, "Son, the car is beautiful. It has everything you could ever want on it, but I don't drive and really don't like the chauffeur, so please return the car."Next, she went to Son 3 and said, "Son, I just want to thank you for your most thoughtful gift. That chicken was delicious."
從前有一個(gè)近乎失明的小老太,，她有三個(gè)兒子,，每一個(gè)都想向母親證明自己對她比較好。第一個(gè)兒子為她買下一棟有15個(gè)房間的大屋,，他覺得這是對母親比較好的孝順方式,，其他兄弟都比不上。二兒子為她買了一輛漂亮 的奔馳,，還配了個(gè)司機(jī),。他也覺得他一定會贏了。老三為母親買了一只鸚鵡,。這只鸚鵡接受了15年的訓(xùn)練，能一字不落地背誦整部圣經(jīng),，并且不論你問他什么,，他都能從圣經(jīng)里原句引出。這位老太太對他的第一個(gè)兒 子說:“孩子,，你買的房子很棒,。但是它太大了，我只能睡一間屋,，還要花時(shí)間去打理剩下的房間,，謝謝你，但我實(shí)在不需要它,?！苯又龑Χ鹤诱f:“你的車也很好,，再不能找到比那更棒的車了，但我不會開車 ,，也不喜歡那個(gè)司機(jī),，所以你把它拿去推了吧！”后,，她對她的小兒子說:“孩子,，我要感謝你棒的禮物！那只雞實(shí)在是美味??！”